Tag Archives: smallville

Television

Down Economy Cancels Good TV

This is a really tough year for good TV. Many shows are canceled or are in imminent danger (but mostly canceled):

Life On Mars: Canceled (but wrapped up nicely)
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles: Canceled (with a bitch of a cliffhanger!)
Dollhouse: Canceled
Life: Canceled (almost certainly, with big plot questions left hanging in the air)
Chuck: Circling the drain (we find out in a week or two)

All those shows have one thing in common dragging them down: bigger budgets. TV executives are being upfront about next season: they expect ad revenues to be down – way down. If the big budget shows can’t bring huge audiences, they’re gone. They’re taking chances on several new shows, which I’m sure are all cheaper to produce.

Fortunately, I can end with some good news. Smallville was supposed to be wrapping up the series this season – perhaps because it’s been running for 8 years, perhaps because CW is trying to be Oxygen for young women. If you’ve been wondering why they haven’t been tying up loose ends (indeed, they seem to be creating more of them), it’s because the CW woke up to the fact that they were about to let one of their most popular shows end for no good reason. So I’m happy to say it will be back in the fall.

Also, there’s no reason to kill shows with budgets equal to what I spend on coffee each year, so It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia will also be back for a 5th season. Huzzah!

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Television

Set Your DVR

You might want to check out the TV Guide Premier Calendar to find out what shows start when this fall (some have already started). On my DVR (in premier order):

90210
I was surprised to find out how well I could compare – in Chuck Klosterman-like1 detail – this new series to the original. I was also surprised that the original debuted 18 years ago (I’m old). Anyway, the kids are more attractive (apparently, no producer has an unattractive daughter who wants an acting career) and have more money this time around. And, of course, by “kids” I mean hotties 18-23 years old. So this generation of teenage viewers will have an even bigger inferiority complex than we did.

I have to say, I was a bit disappointed with the first episode, considering that the creator of the original series was involved along with Freaks and Geeks producers Jeff Judah and Gabe Sachs. Freaks and Geeks is the best HS series of all time, and this is, well, not. They also have Jessica Walters, who played Lucille Bluth on Arrested Development, which is probably the greatest sitcom of all time. Her character is similar, but the dialogue is such a pale, whitewashed version of Lucille’s it’s distracting. Please pay Mitchell Hurwitz whatever he wants to write her lines. Or just let Jessica channel Lucille and say whatever comes to mind; anything to punch it up.

Bones
Dunno how they’ll replace Zack Addy and I think it sucks they have to. Maybe they’ll follow the lead of House and 90210 and replace him with some hot babe.

True Blood
I wasn’t sure about this until I discovered a) it’s on HBO and b) it’s got Anna Paquin. If I were an X-Man, my mutant power would be the ability to have sex with Rogue without dying. Great success!

Entourage
Sex, drugs, and alcohol. And mansions. And supercars. And, occasionally, Seth Green.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Lena Heady and Summer Glau. Two great tastes that taste great together. Now please replace Brian Austin Green with anybody. Maybe Jason Priestly or Ian Ziering.

Fringe
Fox replaced X-Files with Bones, but removed the supernatural part. I guess they want to replace it more directly? Could be interesting.

SNL
You know they’ll bring back Tina Fey to play Sarah Palin. My prediction: Terminator: The Sarah Palin Chronicles.

House
I like the new cast, especially the hot, young, bisexual doctor. There’s just something about her. Something hot, young, and bisexual. Also, Kal Penn is cool. And so is House, for that matter.

Smallville
Final season – ACK! And Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) is gone! And apparently Lana Lang. At least we’ll get to see Kristin Kreuk in the Street Fighter movie. And I hear there will be more Justice League action this season. Let’s hope for a spin-off.

Californication
I haven’t seen this yet, but it’s next in the Netflix queue. Combined with Dexter, it finally makes Showtime justifiable.

Heroes
It sucks that last season was truncated, but hopefully this one will make up for it. Just getting to watch Hayden Panettiere again will be nice, although I miss that cheerleader outfit.

Knight Rider
Ehhhh. I don’t know. I really doubt it. Maybe. But almost certainly not.

The Office
Duh.

The Simpsons
King of the Hill
Family Guy
American Dad
Just happy none of these were canceled (again).

Dexter
Just finished season 2 on Netflix. It’s weird; as the character becomes more human and relatable, his actions become more repulsive. So his motives/needs aren’t so clear now. I hope they work on that this season. But overall, great show.

Chuck
Yes, more Yvonne Strahovski. Also, please bring back Rachel Bilson.

Life
I got into this when I was without a TV and the writer’s strike had me watching stuff I missed. Very glad I caught this. Interesting characters. Hot babes.

Life On Mars
About all I know is that Harvey Keitel stars, and that’s all I need to know to give this a shot.

30 Rock
Duh, Part Deux.

  1. “You used to [not] be able to tell the difference between hipsters and homeless people. Now, it’s between hipsters and retards. I mean, either that guy in the corner in orange safety pants holding a protest sign and wearing a top hat is mentally disabled or he is the coolest fucking guy you will ever know.” -Chuck Klosterman [↩]
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Music

Billboard Top 20 – Is it all shit?

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ZBalance got me thinking. In a recent comment thread, he lamented that he hated top 20 radio, but was concerned his kids wouldn’t.

I find that the older get, the more stuff I like. But top 20? My first thought was, “hell, no”, but I figured I’d better check. So I headed over to Billboard Top 100 and had a look-see.

There was nothing in the top 10 I liked, which satisfied the music snob in me. It’s almost entirely R&B, which is not really my thing. But I continued on and, damnit, I found stuff I didn’t hate:

12. Rihanna – Don’t Stop The Music
Standard club hit, and to be honest, I’ve always liked good house music and club hits. Henry Rollins described industrial dance as house music done right. Obviously I prefer industrial, but I know catchy when I hear it.

13. OneRepublic – Stop And Stare
14. Timbaland Featuring OneRepublic – Apologize
OneRepublic is what I call “Smallville music”. Smallville uses a lot of catchy pop music and has even released two albums. Much of it is stuff I hadn’t heard before, and some of it blows up later. I’m not the only one who has been paying attention; KryptonSite has taken the time to list everything played on Smallville, by season.

OneRepublic, however, has the dubious distinction of being on the most commercialized Smallville episode ever. The entire episode was a commercial for Stride gum and OneRepublic itself – to the point where OneRepublic is shown giving multiple concerts in an abandoned Stride gum factory. I think it was a pretty shameful day for everyone involved.

15. Alicia Keys – No One
After just explaining how I’m not into R&B, I find myself liking this track. What can I say? It grabs you with a solid beat and fantastic vocals.

16. Lupe Fiasco Featuring Matthew Santos – Superstar
This is lush, slickly produced hip hop along the lines of Kanye and Jay-Z, and I do enjoy some of their stuff. Superstar doesn’t quite reach that level, but does have a great hook.

There you have it. I actually like 25% of the top 20. This was certainly a surprise to me. All I can say in my defense was that I did not like the track from “Webbie, Lil’ Phat & Lil’ Boosie”. I cannot tell you how relieved I am to write that.

However, something still isn’t settled. ZB thinks he’s old because he doesn’t like modern music. I understand this; I distinctly remember thinking that if I liked modern music when I aged, it would mean I was still cool. Now, though, it feels like I only appreciate this stuff because I’m getting old. Perhaps it’s time to remind myself that even in my younger days, I could go from Ministry to George Michael without skipping a beat.

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Film

Kristin Kreuk Is Chun Li!

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This is awesome. Kristin Kreuk will play Chun Li, the speed-kicking, high jumping uber cutie in Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li.

I’ve sunk more quarters into Street Fighter II than any other game. I even have an X-Arcade stick, pretty much just for fighting games on MAME. And I think Kristin Kreuk (Lana Lang on Smallville) is one of the loveliest actresses on earth. So this is a big win for me.

I’m also happy to hear Balrog will be played by Michael Clarke Duncan, and Chris Klein will play Nash1 . Moon Bloodgood (the hottie from Journeyman), will also star, but I don’t know who she’ll be playing2. To top it all off, it will be choreographed by Dion Lam who did The Matrix.

The only bummer is that we’ll have to wait ’til 2009 for the release. In the meantime, there’s always Smallville. And a couple photos of our heroines:
Continue reading Kristin Kreuk Is Chun Li! →

  1. I’ll be honest, I didn’t remember Nash/Charlie as I didn’t spend as much time on Street Fighter Alpha. [↩]
  2. Chun Li’s better-endowed sister? [↩]
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Television

CW HD (Finally!) Arrives at TWC

This is the story of a Christmas miracle.

One of the great cable company mysteries here in Southern California was, “why doesn’t Time Warner Cable offer the WB (Warner Brothers) in high definition?” It was very frustrating for me, as the two shows I most wanted to see in HD were Smallville (for high def Lana Lang, whose super power is to withstand extreme closeups with her flawless features) and Enterprise (for high def Sub-Commander T’Pol, who never actually commanded a sub, but did run around in skimpy clothes whilst applying sparkly creams [NSFW]). Alas, Enterprise got canceled, and UPN merged with the WB to become CW1, and still no HD!

Well, last night I was pleasantly surprised to discover that CW (aka KTLA) is now available in HD on channel 405! I went to change all my series recordings on my DVR and was reminded that Smallville is still the only show I watch on that network. [EDIT: How could I forget about Reaper? It’s got Missy Peregrym [sexydesktop.co.uk] who’s also a babe, and also appeared in Smallville (and Heroes, as the incredible changing hottie).]

Fortunately, Kristin Kreuk is still flawless.

Kristin Kreuk

  1. Named, of course, for CBS and Warner Bros. And no, I’m not joking, it’s a 50/50 ownership split. [↩]
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Television

Your New Fall Television Schedule

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The fall television schedule is out, and I have done you a big favor and listed the shows you will be watching. I do this out of love.

Sunday  
8:00 The Simpsons (9/23)
8:30 King of the Hill (9/23)
9:00 The Family Guy (9/23)
9:30 American Dad (9/30)
10:00 Curb Your Enthusiasm (9/9) The only reason not to cancel HBO, but it’s a pretty great reason. The last season finale looked like a series finale, so this was a pleasant surprise. And the season premier had Larry in top form.

Monday		    
8:00 Chuck (9/24) Looks like The 40 Year Old Virgin meets Alias, but could be a big lump of crap. Not sure yet.
8:30 The Big Bang Theory (9/24) 2 geeks and a hottie. My guess is that the geek humor won’t be true geek humor, but what an English major with no geeky friends thinks geek humor is. In other words, a vehicle for "normal" people to laugh at geeks. Maybe I’m wrong, but I doubt it.
9:00 Heroes (9/24)  
9:30 Rules of Engagement (9/24) Two couples and their single friend (David Spade). Looks kinda funny; hopefully it’s another Just Shoot Me. If you don’t have a way of watching/recording two shows, obviously you’ll have to drop this for Heroes.
10:00 Journeyman (9/24) This looks seriously cool, if only because it stars Lucius Vorenus from Rome. And if you haven’t seen Rome, get it on DVD. An incredible $100M+ production, with no shortage of sex, violence, and damn good writing and acting.

Tuesday		    
8:00 Bones (9/25) If you’re short on time, you can skip this. It’s not as cool as X-Files, or as well written as House, but it’s alright.
9:00 House (9/25) The season finale was a big "WTF???" so this is highly anticipated. I’m hoping the new staff is filled by any number of out of work TV hotties: Elisha Cuthbert, Catherine Bell, Eliza Dushku, Jeri Ryan, Jolene Blaylock, Lucy Liu, Michelle Trachtenberg, Mila Kunis (voice work doesn’t count), or Laura Prepon. With David Cross playing an analyst-therapist (or analrapist, as they’re known in the medical field).
9:00 Reaper (9/25) I initially wrote this off after reading the synopsis: a comedy about a guy who’s parents sold his soul to the devil, so he now has to work for him as a bounty hunter. It’s on the CW, and I was never into Buffy or Angel or Supernatural. But I just found out the pilot is being directed by Kevin Smith, so at least the first episode will be worth watching.

Wednesday		    
8:00 Pushing Daisies (10/3) Jury’s out on this, too. I do like the concept of a guy who can bring back the dead, but only uses that power to pick up some extra cash. It just screams underachiever.
9:00 Bionic Woman (9/26)  

Thursday		    
8:00 Smallville (9/27) Is Lana alive?!? Wait, don’t answer that!
8:00 Scrubs (10/25) Final season 🙁
8:30 30 Rock (10/4) If you weren’t impressed at the start of last season, this got way funnier as the season progressed. And Catrina Bowden is crazy hot.
9:00 The Office (9/27)  
10:00 It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (9/13) Two episode premier!

Friday		    
8:00 Next Great American Band (10/19) Produced and written (the scripted parts, at least) by The Crack Team’s own Agent Mystery! Destined to be the best show on television, winning multiple Emmys and getting all team members of The Crack Team totally laid (details pending, but it will probably involve groupies, mistaken identities, and shenanigans). Click the link to check out the Agent Hulagun-designed MySpace page.
9:00 Moonlight (9/28) Alternate title: Count Dracula, Private Eye. Eh, it’s vampires, so I’m in it for the goth chicks.
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